Day 353 blog

Sometimes we get so caught up taking care of everyone around us that we forget we’re people who need care, too.

We’re the ones checking in, making the phone calls, showing up when someone needs us, offering encouragement, remembering the little things, and doing what we can to make someone else’s life a little easier. We want the people we love to feel supported, appreciated, and never alone.

But somewhere along the way, we can become so focused on making sure everyone else is okay that we stop asking ourselves the same question.

Am I okay, too?

It’s easy to give other people grace while being incredibly hard on ourselves. We tell our friends that they’re doing a great job, that they deserve a break, that one bad day doesn’t define them, and that they don’t have to have everything figured out. Yet when it comes to ourselves, we expect perfection. We keep pushing, keep giving, and keep telling ourselves we’ll slow down later.

We deserve to hear the same words we so freely give to others.

You can be strong and still need support. You can be successful and still need a break. You can love people deeply and still need time for yourself. You can be the person everyone depends on without being available for absolutely everything, every single day.

Making yourself a priority doesn’t mean you’re selfish. It means you understand that you matter, too.

And I think sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we don’t have to earn rest, love, kindness, or happiness by doing something for someone else first. Our worth isn’t measured by how much we accomplish, how many people we help, how much money we make, or how many responsibilities we can carry without asking for help.

We’re human beings, not machines. We have feelings, needs, limits, and days when we simply need to take a step back and breathe.

For me, faith is an important reminder that God never asked us to find our entire worth in what we do. Our identity is so much bigger than our accomplishments or the roles we fill in other people’s lives. We can work hard, serve others, love our families, build businesses, and show up for the people around us while still making room to take care of the person God created us to be.

Sometimes taking care of yourself means saying no without feeling guilty. Sometimes it means stepping away from the noise, spending time in prayer, getting outside, going to the gym, laughing with friends, or enjoying a quiet evening without feeling like you should be doing something more productive.

And sometimes it means recognizing that you’ve been pouring from an empty cup and giving yourself permission to refill it.

You cannot control how everyone treats you, how much they appreciate you, or whether they return the love and effort you give them. But you can control whether you continue abandoning your own needs in the hope that someone else will eventually notice.

Don’t wait until you’re completely exhausted to give yourself a break. Don’t wait until you’re overwhelmed to ask for help. Don’t wait for someone else to remind you that you deserve good things.

Give yourself the same patience you give your friends. Celebrate your own progress. Forgive yourself for the days you don’t get everything done. Make time for the things that bring you joy. Surround yourself with people who care about you as a person, not just for what you can do for them.

And remember, you can love people without losing yourself in the process.

At the end of the day, I want to be someone who shows up for the people I love, who gives generously, who makes a difference, and who lives with purpose. But I also want to remember that my own life deserves to be lived, enjoyed, and cared for along the way.

We spend so much time hoping the people around us feel loved. Let’s make sure we’re not leaving ourselves out of that equation.

You deserve the love you give. You deserve the grace you extend. You deserve the kindness you show everyone else.

So today, make time for yourself, thank God for the person He’s helping you become, and remember that taking care of yourself isn’t taking anything away from anyone else.

You matter, too.

Signed, Paulina.