Day 356

One thing I have learned as I continue to grow is that the people you allow into your life matter. The energy they bring, the way they treat you, and the effort they make all play a part in the kind of life you build for yourself.

You deserve people who are genuinely happy to see you. People who check on you because they want to know how you are doing, not because they need something from you. People who remember the little things you tell them, celebrate your accomplishments, and make an effort to be part of your life without you constantly having to ask.

You deserve connections that feel genuine, where you are not left questioning your place in someone’s life or wondering whether your presence matters to them.

The right people will not leave you constantly guessing whether they care. Their actions will give you a reason to feel secure in the connection.

I think sometimes we get so used to being the person who reaches out first, makes the plans, checks in, and shows up that we forget relationships are supposed to go both ways. It is wonderful to be someone who cares deeply, but it is just as important to recognize when that care is not being reciprocated.

There is a difference between someone being busy and someone consistently making no effort. Everyone has responsibilities, demanding schedules, and seasons when life gets overwhelming. Genuine relationships do not require constant communication or unlimited availability. They require consideration, consistency, and a willingness to make room for the people who matter.

You should not have to question whether someone wants you around. You should not have to repeatedly remind someone that communication matters to you or convince them that making an effort is important. And you should not have to shrink your expectations just to keep someone in your life.

At the same time, I think it is important to recognize that people express care differently. Not everyone will communicate in exactly the same way, and not every relationship will look the same. What matters is whether there is genuine effort, mutual respect, and a shared desire to maintain the connection.

Pay attention to how you feel around the people in your life. Do you feel appreciated? Do you feel comfortable being yourself? Can you celebrate your wins without feeling like you are asking for too much? Can you be honest about your struggles without feeling like a burden?

These things matter.

As I continue growing, I want to be intentional about the people I surround myself with. I want relationships that add value to my life, where support is mutual and happiness for one another comes naturally. I want people who are secure enough to celebrate others, mature enough to communicate honestly, and intentional enough to show up when it matters.

I would rather have a smaller circle of genuine people than a large circle of connections that only exist when they are convenient.

And I believe this applies to every part of life, from friendships to romantic relationships to business partnerships. The people who belong in your life should respect your time, appreciate your presence, and demonstrate through their actions that the relationship matters to them.

From a faith perspective, I also believe God teaches us the importance of discernment. Not every person is meant to walk with us through every season, and not every connection is meant to last forever. Some people bring beautiful lessons into our lives, while others become part of the blessings we get to experience along the way.

We can love people, pray for them, and wish them well while still recognizing that certain relationships may no longer align with the season we are entering.

That does not mean becoming cold or expecting perfection. It means understanding that your time, energy, and heart are valuable, too.

You can be a person who gives love freely without accepting relationships that leave you feeling consistently undervalued.

Never lose your kindness. Never stop being the person who checks in, celebrates others, and shows up when it matters. But remember that you deserve to experience that same thoughtfulness in return.

Do not let disappointing experiences convince you that genuine connections no longer exist. There are people who will be excited to see you, proud of your accomplishments, interested in your life, and willing to make an effort because you matter to them.

Make room for those people. Appreciate them. Be that kind of person for them, too.

At the end of the day, I do not think we need perfect people in our lives. We need genuine people. People whose words and actions align, who understand the importance of mutual effort, and who make it clear that the relationship is something they value.

Life is too short to spend all your energy trying to prove your worth to people who are unwilling to recognize it.

Choose relationships where care is mutual, effort is appreciated, and your presence feels welcomed rather than tolerated.

You deserve to feel valued, not because you have to earn your place in someone’s life every day, but because genuine connections are built on two people choosing to show up for each other.

Signed, Paulina.